Hitting, Pitching, and RSN

Believe it or not, the Yankees are pretty similar to most other teams in one respect - their success hinges on a player or two carrying the team. Early in the year, it was Robinson Cano. Later, it was Mark Teixeira. Still later, Brett Gardner and Nick Swisher shouldered the team. Unfortunately, the Yankees are losing right now because none of their players are hot.

There's a simple remedy to the arctic bats in New York: Alex Rodriguez. He was just getting his power back when that calf injury cropped up, and his expected return in the next week would likely catapult the Yankees into a hot streak just like it did last May. Simply relieving the pressure on Cano (who is, frankly, dreadful in key situations) by moving him down in the lineup would be a big help.

Of course, there's never one reason for a team's struggles. The Yankee starting pitching staff has also been dreadful recently. Unfortunately, there's no A-Rod around the corner to rescue the pitchers. Andy Pettitte would straighten things out in a big hurry (the Yankees have struggled at 20-17 since his last start), but he isn't due back for at least another two weeks. So the starters will just have to ride things out until Pettitte can come back and save the day.

Naturally, ESPN is buzzing about how resiliant the Yankees have been in the last month or so whilst missing their best hitter and their second-best pitcher. Wait - ESPN (which should be known as RSN - Red Sox Nation) is too busy lauding the Red Sox for their resiliance in overcoming their injuries to pay any attention to the li'l ol' Yankees team.

Hydra
6-4-3 double play... Ballgame over! Yankees win! Theeeeeee Yankees win!

A Lack of Heavy Hitting

The Yankees are having trouble winning games because they can't hit. The obvious solution to this problem is to, you know, hit. But if they continue to struggle, the Yankees need to change the batting order so the hitters who are stuggling the least are at the top of the lineup.

First, Curtis Granderson needs to hit higher in the order, because he's about the only Yankee who is hitting well right now. Gardner also needs to move up. He ignites the offense when he gets on base, so it makes sense to give him as many at-bats as possible. Our next move is to shift Posada, who has stunk for a long time now, down in the lineup. Like, way down. Cano has also struggled lately, so he can move down as well. After all our changes are applied, this is what the lineup would look like:

Gardner LF
Granderson CF
Jeter SS
Teixeira 1B
Rodriguez 3B
Swisher RF
Cano 2B
Thames DH
Posada C

Now, we know too many egos would be rubbed the wrong way with that lineup. So we have also pieced together a lineup that is still good, but more realistic:

Jeter SS
Granderson CF
Teixiera 1B
Rodriguez 3B
Swisher RF
Cano 2B
Posada C
Thames DH
Gardner LF

This lineup, because Gardner is not leading off and Posada is hitting seventh instead of ninth, is not as good as our "ideal" lineup. However, we still think this lineup is an improvement over the Yankees's typical lineup because Granderson has been moved up to second and Swisher is in the fifth slot.

Ultimately, the Yankees need to start hitting. While we think our lineups would be better than the current Yankee lineup, it doesn't really matter who hits where when nobody can hit anybody in at any time.

Our clock is ticking. Two more days of wretched hitting, and we at Hydra will hit the panic button. Don't be surprised if a fire brigade pulls up outside Yankee Stadium on Thursday.

Hydra
6-4-3 double play... Ballgame over! Yankees win! Theeeeeee Yankees win!

Baseball Dummies and Bamboo

After long deliberations, we have finally come to a decision. The choice was difficult, as there were many candidates to choose from. But we have now picked the ESPN Sunday Night Baseball booth as the worst group of current national sports commentators.

It was a close call. How could it be otherwise? Though Joe Buck is good, his FOX Saturday Baseball partner, Tim McCarver, singlehandedly brought that pair into a close second in the worst commentator race. Again, Joe Buck is a good commentator, but listening to Troy Aikman, his pessimistic, critical partner in FOX NFL Sunday, is like having someone stick bamboo under our fingernails.

But the ESPN Sunday Night Baseball group proudly came away with the prize. There are many, many annoying things about that booth. Jon Miller has the strangest inflections in his voice. Everything is new! And exciting! And so-and-so is the Greatest Player! Ever! Joe Morgan wrote a book called "Baseball for Dummies." Enough said. Orel Hershiser is obviously a newbie in the booth, as many of his sentences are rather awkward.

Now, we at Hydra mute, on average, half of each Yankee game on ESPN. We just can't take it for very long. However, to our knowledge, the doofuses have not once said "Reigning World Champions" this year. Last night, Joe Morgan did say that this year's Yankees are not as good as the World Series-winning team of last year, but they're still a "good team." Um, good team? Last time we checked, the Yankees had the best record in baseball.

But the most annoying thing about that booth is the anti-Yankee bias. The pity-party thrown for the Red Sox by the commentators was nauseating. No one felt sorry for the Yankees when they used twelve different starting pitchers a few years ago.

By the way, did anyone notice THE TIE? It's always entertaining to see what Jon Miller is wearing - and if you watched the game last night, you couldn't have missed his unusual wardrobe.

Hydra
6-4-3 double play... Ballgame over! Yankees win! Theeeeeee Yankees win!

Fire Alarms and Dark Clouds in the East

Call out the fire brigade! The Yankees team is burning to the ground!

That is a typical New Yorker's response to the news that the Yankees no longer lead the AL East. New Yorkers overreact. First of all, the Rays only have a one-game lead. Second, the loss of the division lead could be a good thing for the Yankees. Complacency in baseball is a terrible thing. The Yankees need to fight through some baseball-related adversity during the regular season if they're going to win in the playoffs. Since it is only the beginning of August, they have plenty of time to make up one game in the standings. Finally, A-Rod will hit his 600th home run any day now, and that's the only thing the Yankees need to start winning consistently again.

The main reason the Yankees have fallen from the top of the AL East is A-Rod's recent struggles. Under constant bombardment from the media about his seeming lack of ability to hit #600, he has gone hitless in his last five games - games where the Yankees have gone 1-4. A-Rod is only human. No one would be able to ignore the criticism and pressure placed on him by the fans - and the media.

History has shown that the Yankees need A-Rod to hit well in order to win. The only playoff series the Yankees won with A-Rod before 2009 was the 2004 Divisional Series against the Twins. We all know how that season ended. He struggled through the next three playoff series - and the Yankees lost all of them. (Of course, Torre was a big reason why they lost those series, but we don't want to drag that long discussion into this post.) In 2009, A-Rod performed well in the playoffs. The Yankees won the World Series. Coincidence? We think not.

In the end, when every pitch in A-Rod's at-bats are scrutinized, when every out he makes is a huge disappointment to the media and the fans, the Yankees end up the losers.

All in all, the outlook for the Yankees is pretty sunny. Especially since Kevin Youkilis's injury guarentees rainy weather in Boston over the next few weeks.

Hydra
6-4-3 double play... Ballgame over! Yankees win! Theeeeeee Yankees win!